Take a good look at the reference circle.
Have you ever felt bad after a relationship with someone?
You may know someone who complains about even the smallest details and is unhappy.
Negative thoughts about a person who is constantly in a bad mood negatively affects your personal development and mood, you can relate so badly to his unpleasant sensations that you suddenly feel tired or even a headache.
Of course, you need to do everything possible and help a person, fill him with a positive, be kind to him, but everything has its own terms and limits! Unfortunately, this perspective often confuses us when it comes time to start a project.
Some key signs of toxicity are:
- manipulation and other emotional abuse
- dishonesty and deceit
- difficulty offering compassion to others
- a tendency to create drama or conflict
Avoid playing into their reality
Some people have a tendency to see themselves as the victim in every situation.
If they mess up, they might shift the blame to someone else or tell a story that paints them in a more positive light.
You might feel tempted to nod and smile in order to prevent an angry outburst. This might feel like the safest option, but it can also encourage them to see you as a supporter.
Try respectful disagreement instead. While your disagreement might upset them, it might also lower the chances they’ll try involving you again.
Pay attention to how they make you feel
Most people occasionally say rude or hurtful things they don’t mean. No one feels their best all the time, and being in a bad mood can make you lash out. This isn’t necessarily toxic.
But ask yourself if put-downs, lies, or other types of emotional and verbal abuse characterize most of your interactions. Do they apologize or seem to notice how what they say or do affects you?
Talk to them about their behavior
Someone who gossips, manipulates others, or creates dramatic situations night not realize how their behavior affects you or anyone else.
An open conversation may help them realize this behavior is unacceptable. For example, if you are dealing with a lie, you can explain that trust is most important to you in a friendship, and if you are cheated on again, you will end the friendship with him.
Put yourself first
You might value your relationship with this person, but don’t offer support at the risk of your own well-being.
Remember, you aren’t at fault
Toxic behavior can make you feel like you did something wrong, even when you know you didn’t. But remind yourself their behavior has nothing to do with you. Restate your boundaries and try not to take their spite personally.
Make yourself unavailable
People who act in a toxic way “can often sense who they can manipulate".
They may move on when they see their tactics don’t work on you.”
Limit your time together
Do you dread seeing a particular person? Feel anxious or stressed beforehand? Take these feelings as a sign you may want to see them less.
People who behave toxically tend to focus on themselves and what they want. They might blame you or other people for any problems they have and show little interest in your feelings or needs. This can make spending time with them unpleasant.
Source:
https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-deal-with-toxic-people#takeaway